her

i think i'm a lot better off than i think i am
maybe it's better that i don't have such responsibilities
not many can claim the experiences i have
few can know what i feel when i sit with her
that blend of comfort and awkwardness
that can only exist with no bond deeper than that of pure friendship
much as i want such a bond to happen
maybe it's better that it doesn't happen
i see what can happen should something go wrong
and without this bond, then there is little danger
so maybe i'm better off


but how i want it to happen. how i want it so much